Welcoming Another Grandchild into the Family? How to Help Parents & Older Siblings
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What’s more exciting than finding out that you’re going to be a grandparent? Few things, but finding out that your grandchild is getting a sibling must be high on the list!
By now, you’ve gotten used to your role of grandparent. You’ve figured out the best way to support parents and established a relationship with your grandchild. So what can you do to help them all during this exciting transition?
What grandparents can do to help parents after Baby #2
First, brush off your copy of the “Partnering with Parents” section of New Grandparent Essentials. You’ll want to ask parents many of the same questions regarding their plans for the birth, visitors, etc. Their answers may be quite different now that they’ve actually been through the experience.
Above all, ask them how you can be helpful. After a baby arrives, most parents can use an extra pair of hands. They may appreciate a grandparent helping with:
Meals
Household chores
Running errands
Walking the dog
Playing chauffeur
For more ideas, check out 10 Ways to Help New Parents. Your child and their partner may not be new parents, but all of the suggestions in the post still stand. In addition to those suggestions, parents may need help with childcare for the older sibling. Or they may just appreciate a few hours to bond with the newborn while you take grandchild #1 to the park and out to lunch.
Then again, they may want time for their growing family to bond with one another, and not need your help. Make sure not to make assumptions: open the conversation and listen to what they feel is best.
Helping your grandchild when they become a big brother or sister
Parents aren’t the only ones who will be adjusting to a new normal. Your grandchild is also about to have their world rocked. You can be a steadying force in their life as they get used to having a younger sibling. Here are some things to keep in mind:
Keep up your routines. If you’ve established regular routines, make sure to maintain them. Whether it’s a weekly FaceTime or a visit on Saturday afternoons, try to keep those times consistent. Use that time to focus on just your first grandchild, rather than talking about the baby. You’ll have plenty of time to get to know the new baby as the months go by.
When you first visit, make sure you greet and interact with parents and your older grandchild before the baby. Take some time to talk to your older grandchild about things other than the baby before asking if they like being an older brother or sister. They need to know you are still interested in them, not just their new role. Ask them if they’d like to introduce their new sibling to you.
Keep this up with subsequent visits. Focusing first on your older grandchild will keep them from feeling like they’ve been replaced by someone more exciting.
Another thing you can do is offer to care for the baby so parents can spend time with older sibling. Even just a half hour while baby is sleeping so that parents can take the older child for a walk around the neighborhood can help ease the transition to having a new brother or sister.
The new sibling gift pack from Lovevery is the perfect way to prepare your grandchild for the arrival of a new baby. It includes tools that will help your grandchild process their feelings, learn to safely play with the new baby, and understand ways they can help. It also includes guidance for parents as they add a new child to the family.
Help entertain older siblings when there’s a new baby
While being there to help out is great, there are ways to help even from a distance. Put together an activity pack for times when parents are busy with the new baby. Include age-appropriate activities that can be done with minimal supervision: things like a new coloring book, paint with water books, Magna Doodle, and new books to look at. We’ve put together some ideas in our Amazon shop—see them here.
If parents have a phone or tablet your grandchild can use, record some books with Make Momentos. This will let your grandchild listen to you read a story any time parents need a few moments, without worrying about whether you are available or not.
A Final Word of Warning
Now that you have more than one grandchild, you have someone new to love. While that first grandchild will always be special, make sure you don’t ever play favorites. There is nothing sadder to a child than seeing that a sibling or cousin gets better gifts or more attention from a grandparent.
A new baby is a chance for grandparents to provide even more love and support for their growing family. With a little thought and preparation, you can make the transition an easier one for all involved.
If you missed New Grandparent Essentials when your first grandchild arrived, it’s not too late to take advantage of all it offers! Veteran grandparents find it just as helpful in making sure they are aligned with parents in the ways that matter! See how it can help you.