Want to announce your first grandchild's arrival? Today's digital world requires careful consideration of privacy and parents' wishes. Learn how to share your joy while protecting your new family.

Becoming a grandparent is an exciting event! It’s natural to want to share the good news with our friends. With social media's instant accessibility, the desire to immediately post a first grandchild announcement is strong. However, it's crucial for first-time grandparents to balance enthusiasm with respect for the new parents' wishes and your grandchild's privacy. This is one of your first acts as a grandparent, so it’s important to get it right.

The time-honored custom of mailing out birth announcements has all but vanished. Now, a baby’s birth is most often announced in a social media post. And new grandparents want to share the good news, too, especially when that baby is the first grandchild!  

Before any over-excited grandparents make that announcement on Facebook, you need to remember that posting all the details of a baby’s arrival on social media is different from mailing cards to your friends and family. When someone sends a traditional physical birth announcement, the information goes to a select group of friends and family. When grandparents share photos with their friends on social media, they are also sharing them with the world.

Any photo posted publicly can end up being used by anyone for anything. Even if you are very careful with your privacy settings, photos posted on social media can still end up being shared more widely than the poster intended. Your enthusiastic cousin may share your post (or take a screenshot and post it on her account)—and suddenly, an extra 1,382 people have the photo. More importantly, they may have details that should be carefully guarded.

What sort of details? Personally identifiable information (PII) is anything that an identity thief or hacker might be able to use for sinister purposes. This includes names, birthdates, birthplace, and mother's maiden name—four pieces of information that are commonly found in social media birth announcements.

Even with your privacy settings set as securely as possible, nothing posted on the internet is truly secure. In 2017, a million children in the US were victims of identity theft, highlighting the importance of protecting your grandchild's personal information from the very beginning.

Now that you know what not to include, there is another important thing to consider.

Before sharing any information or photos about your new grandchild, it's crucial to ask the parents how they feel about grandparents posting on social media. Have you had a clear conversation about their wishes? Parent chat boards are full of complaints about grandparents sharing pictures on social media after parents have asked them not to do so.

Some parents want no photos or details posted at all. Others want only photos that don’t show their child’s face. Whatever their preferences, it's essential to respect them. It’s not worth social media’s dopamine rush to post a picture and damage the relationship with your adult children. 

What’s the first thing excited grandparents-to-be want to do? Even before they start shopping? They want to tell the world that they are about to become a grandparent! Social media makes that easy, but it’s crucial that you wait until the parents give you a green light. This is just the first of many, many instances in which you will need to follow their lead.

Likewise, when the baby is born, wait until the parents have had a chance to post their own announcement. Ask for permission before you jump in and post your happy news, and consider waiting an extra day or two so that the parents can fully enjoy the congratulations they deserve.

Following these guidelines will do two things. First, they’ll show parents you respect their position on social media. Second, they will protect your grandchild by making sure their digital footprint isn’t started too soon. 

• Do ask permission before sharing any information or photos

• Do wait for the parents to post first

• Do respect the parents' wishes regarding social media sharing

• Do be mindful of the information you share, avoiding PII

• Don't include personally identifiable information such as full name, birthdate, or location

• Don't share photos without explicit permission from the parents

• Don't be offended if parents ask you to limit or avoid social media posts

• Don't forget to enjoy the moment and prioritize your relationship with the new family

If the parents prefer to limit social media exposure, don’t despair. There are many other ways to share the news of the birth of your first grandchild. You can:

• Send personalized emails or text messages to close friends and family

• Wait to share the news in a holiday letter

• Make phone calls to share the news personally

• Ask parents if you can host a small gathering to introduce the baby to your inner circle

• Create a private, password-protected photo album to share with trusted friends or family

Instead of celebrating your grandchild’s arrival online, think about other ways you can mark this momentous occasion. You might want to start a grandparent journal to record your thoughts and experiences. Other ideas include:

• Creating a scrapbook with photos and other mementos

• Writing a heartfelt letter to your grandchild to be read in the future

• Planting a tree in honor of your grandchild's birth

These personal ways to celebrate are more meaningful than any social media post. What’s more, they respect parents' wishes and protect your grandchild's privacy.

The joy of becoming a grandparent is much bigger than any social media post. By prioritizing your family's wishes and your grandchild's safety, you're setting the foundation for a loving and respectful relationship that will last a lifetime. 

Do you want to learn more about social media safety? More Than Grand offers a handy tip sheet for protecting your grandchild’s privacy online. You can download 6 Tips for Protecting Your Grandchildren on Social Media here. 

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